If you want to create a healthy work culture and truly address disruptive behaviors, there’s one thing you absolutely must do – start building a stronger partnership with HR.
As someone who works with healthcare leaders across the country, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard both sides of the same frustrating story. A leader reaches out, ready to take action on a toxic employee – they’ve finally had enough. But when they go to HR, they hit a wall. HR asks about documentation, previous counseling attempts, and past performance reviews that show “meets expectations” across the board. Suddenly, nothing moves forward.
But here’s the thing – HR professionals feel just as stuck. They get managers in their office demanding action with no prior warning, no record, and often, no context. They’re left trying to piece together a case that’s shaky at best.
Here’s what I’ve learned: the problem isn’t a lack of desire to address these issues – it’s the lack of partnership and proactive planning between leadership and HR.
Let’s fix that.
Step 1: See Through Each Other’s Lens
Start by acknowledging that leaders and HR view situations differently – and that’s okay. Leaders focus on patient safety, morale, and unit performance. HR focuses on protecting employees and the organization while following legal and procedural guidelines.
Different lenses, same goal – a healthy, high-functioning workplace. Recognizing this is the first step toward building a stronger partnership with HR.
Step 2: Have a Coffee Chat
Before you need their help, reach out to your HR partner and say, “Can we grab a coffee?” Get to know each other as human beings, not just job titles. Then share your intent: “I want to address disruptive behaviors on my team, and I’d like to partner with you to do it the right way.”
That simple act of connection sets the tone for collaboration rather than conflict.
Step 3: Create a Communication Plan
Don’t wait until things escalate to involve HR. Agree ahead of time on what a “heads-up” looks like. It might be an email with the subject line “Heads-up,” a quick text, or even a code word that signals priority.
Make sure your HR partner knows when and how you plan to intervene – and ask them what they need from you to support it.
Step 4: Use a Tiered Response Approach
Not every issue requires formal corrective action. Here’s what we recommend – and make sure HR agrees with this plan:
- First incident: A calm, direct conversation. “Hey, I heard you were yelling during shift change. That’s not okay. What’s going on?” Keep it informal, document it for yourself, but don’t involve HR just yet.
- Second incident: Now you follow up with HR. “Just a heads-up – I’ve already addressed this once, and it’s happened again.” You send the employee a brief email summary and let HR know you’re documenting.
- Third incident or serious behavior: This is when HR needs to step in and guide the formal process.
Agreeing on this flow with HR ahead of time prevents surprises and keeps everyone aligned.
Step 5: Decide What You Want
Before you walk into HR’s office to vent, ask yourself – what do I want to happen with this employee? Do I want to keep coaching them? Put them on corrective action? Terminate?
When you walk in and say, “I’ve decided I want to terminate this employee – what do you need from me to make it stick?” you show that you’ve done your homework, and now HR can do theirs.
Final Thoughts
Building a stronger partnership with HR isn’t just a nice idea – it’s essential. You cannot sustain a healthy culture or hold people accountable without their support. Start small with a coffee chat, set your intentions, and plan your process together.
Most disruptive employees don’t become professional overnight – and culture doesn’t change overnight either. But when you take these steps, you’re laying the groundwork for real, lasting change.
If you want more help building your HR-leader relationship, module five of our Eradicating Bullying & Incivility course covers this in detail. It’s time to make HR your partner, not your obstacle.
